“Family comes first”
What was the first thought that came to your mind when you read that quote? Before you read on, I want you to write that thought on a piece of paper (or just hold on to that thought).
Nowadays, it seems that people have interperated this quote very differently. It seriously saddens me that it’s becoming more “family comes last” day after day. I see brothers and sisters fighting every day for the silliest reasons, parents arguing with their children, even punishing them just because they are too damn proud to admit that they were wrong. Is this really what is becoming of what ‘was’ a sacred bond?
No bond is more sacred than that of a family, there is a reason why we don’t choose who our family are, you can choose to neglect them, ignore them but NEVER deny the fact that they are your family. The reason we don’t get to choose our family is that we are not supposed to like them, you WILL have arguments together and some serious issues, but we’re supposed to love them nonetheless, no matter what they do that’s NOT supposed to change.
My message to the eldest brothers or sisters in the family is please, don’t be the last person on your sibling’s mind when they need help, don’t let them think you are the LAST person that will EVER -willingly- help. I really don’t understand the big deal with swallowing your pride and doing something nice for your younger brother or sister. Believe me it makes ALL the difference in the WORLD for them to know you support them, or that you’re proud of them. If you think your brother or sister is an idiot/lame or whatever label you’d like to call them, THINK AGAIN, there’s a reason you think that, and that is because you do NOT know them. Not the real them, you’re only focusing on their “family side”…
Why is it fair that you do not help them have a better start than you did? A better life? Why do you think they should suffer as much as you did alone? Wouldn’t it have helped if you had someone to help you during YOUR hard times? Does the idea of your sibling to SUFFER as much as you did really makes you happy? If you are then you seriously have some issues you need to work out.
In the end, I urge you not to judge with the “family” mask, try to understand their position, put yourself in their shoes see how it FEELS to be them, because only then will you be a ‘true’ sibling. Now I want you to take a look at the paper with what you wrote, and take a look at it again, then read the first quote again (or just compare what what was in your head, with what thought the second time you saw the quote).
Disagree? Have a question or a suggestion?
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All the best,